Becoming a creature of habit

In general, I am not a creature of habit. I tend to live a pretty unstructured life when there’s nothing external requiring me to maintain structure.

If I make a priority of establishing a routine for some goal, I can usually do it for a while. For example, I didn’t have too much trouble getting started writing posts here again. But before I got a nice message from a reader of the journal, I only had vague intentions to start again. The impetus came from outside me.

Lately, I’ve been in a season of life where very little daily structure is imposed on me. And it’s been hard to accomplish things! I’ve been thinking for a while that more routine would be really helpful, but it’s much harder when it’s not coming from external requirements.

However, I’m potentially heading towards a near future where that will all change quickly, and I’m pondering what it will take for me to become a creature of habit, perhaps even more than I ever have before. It might be difficult for me to make the switch, now that I’ve gotten so used to a lack of structure and expectations.

On the other hand, I don’t know if the problem has ever been that I’m incapable of maintaining structure, only that I haven’t been placing myself in the right conditions for structure to flourish. So I think that if I get a clear picture in my head of what is required of me, and what I need to require of myself to make that work, I’ll be able to make the switch.

It will certainly feel different, though. The picture of myself in a regular, functional, daily routine feels like it’s from a completely different life than mine. When I get there, looking back on this time might feel equally unreal and dreamlike. It’s a strange feeling when you think your personality’s about to change.

Are you a creature of habit? Is it by nature or by necessity? Are you on the cusp of a life change? Let me know your thoughts at my Ctrl-C email: gome ​@ ​ctrl-c.club.